Opening Inventory

4am is as good a time as any for introspection and revelation. on my 5th consecutive session of late/early pondering, a sort of nauseous feeling appeared and it became time for action. 

actual. 

action. 

i'm certain that i am one of probably a million new bloggers, making big promises to myself and to anonymous readers who may or may not actually materialize. i can't even promise that i'll be any different. this isn't the first "i'm going to change my life starting now (or in the morning or on Monday or on the 1st of the month/year/decade) moments that i've had. in fact, i'm one of those people who is constantly visualizing a vastly different future whilst doing terribly little to achieve it. 

so here we are... hoping that somewhere in me is a real live start. 

i'm sure that background and humor and cute anecdotes will arrive eventually. i am, for the moment, a virginal and incompetent blogger with little to offer other than a (not)healthy dose of discomfort about who i am and where i fit...

And so... the inventory.

Years: 25.8

Marriages: 1

Divorces: 1

New Relationships: .75 (especially when factoring in long distance... not an online meeting... we'll get to it one day)

Children: 2

Basement Apartment: 1

Credit Score: 567

Hourly Pay: $10.50

Vehicles with Questionable Transmissions: 1

Dollars in Bank Account: $3.96

Formal Education: 0

Hours Spent Developing Hobbies and Self Interest: 0

Height: 5'9"

Weight: 342 lbs. 

Energy Level: 3

Desired Energy Level: 1000

<In this place, I had written a lengthy explanation of my weight and all it impacts and my feelings about better jobs and a more secure and delightful foundation for my children, but... the beauty of a blog without readers is: i don't need to explain or justify or rationalize. Sure, that day might come and I may or may not oblige. But for now, the truth is clear: A CHANGE IS GONNA COME. And whether that change is a downward spiral or me actually living my life, time will tell....

Wish me luck?

LUCK.